The Pitching and Offensive Performances of the Week were a category lasting throughout 2007, created by former Benevolent Overlord Russ Oates. The posts were essentially tables of Rockies pitching and hitting statistics for a given week, and a poll where Rowbots could vote on who Colorado's offensive player and pitcher of the week were.

These poll results held no sway outside of Purple Row, but they were still well-liked. They were technically classified under The Rockpile.